Keeping your relationships on track

Here are some issues and ideas you will find very useful exploring together.

1. Communication
Uninterrupted time; open listening; express feelings, thoughts and needs clearly; clarify understandings; explore and change negative thoughts; use ‘I statements; empathic respect; write to each other

2. Problem solving
Identify preferences; set goals; generate options; test solutions; try other solutions if necessary; evaluate

3. Managing conflict
Diffuse anger; explore values; identify real issues; tolerate differing opinions; generate solutions; test/reexplore options; use appropriate humour; make-up; plan future strategies; ask for, and grant, forgiveness

4. Shared activities
Couple as a ‘team’; celebrate anniversaries, birthdays; regular ‘dates’; travel; traditions; rituals; reminisce

5. Solo activities
Each person having separate interests and hobbies

6. Intimacy
Quality time; express love; discuss needs; make requests; satisfying sex life; plan activities; quiet moments; relaxation; fun times; holidays; travel.

7. Connections
Mealtimes; socialise with friends; time with family and in-laws; nurture intergenerational links

8. Wellbeing
Values; spirituality; community; volunteering; nature; health; culture; exercise; nutrition; art; theatre; literature; movies; music; dance

9. Lifestyle
Children; roles; housework; finances; career; be bold and optimistic; pets; explore purpose/happiness in life

10. Networks
Consult with your GP; relationship specialist; religious minister.